I have been absent for a few weeks, I was trying to jump on the last two weeks topics, but unfortunately time got the better of me. I saw the topic and I knew I had to force myself to get it done because this is another one of my favorite things.
If you don’t know about Cryptozoology (Loosely translated: Crazy People Looking For Monsters) it is the study of animals that exist outside scientific knowledge. There are some that everyone knows:
While the Kraken has been one of my all time favorites, it’s not quite a Cryptid any longer. They aren’t quite big enough to take down massive ships(that we know of!!), but we have found Giant and even Colossal Squid! So, cool. The other cool thing about Kraken(s?) is; considering the length of time they have existed, its very possible that in the days of open seas and unknown continents there were nearly ship sized creatures other than whales swimming about (what an ugly sentence that was)!!!
Since most people know about the heavyweights of the Cryptozoology realm, I would like to take you on a dip into the pool of lesser known Cryptids. Come on in the water is ferocious.
Basically if you haven’t seen the movie about this particular phenomena take a peek. (The Mothman Prophecies) Basically, in a little town called Point Pleasant WV, a giant winged creature with red eyes, is known as a harbinger of doom/cosmic town crier. What I mean by that is, it’s presence is somewhat of a grey-area. Some cryptozoologists view Mothman as an evil entity that is part of the doom that is supposedly coming, while others think it is a being that is sent to warn people prior to huge acts of destruction. Either way pretty crazy stuff. Initially, Mothman was just considered a boogeyman who ate dogs and scared half-naked teenagers, and was formed from nuclear/toxic/chemical waste. Later a story started about a Native American chief who cursed the area and Mothman was his form of vengeance. Then, on December 15th 1967 there was a terrible catastrophe. A bridge filled with rush hour traffic collapsed just days before Christmas. After that Mothman was never seen again in Point Pleasant. Spooky right? Oh they have a statue commemorating the Angel/Demon, as well as a festival.
You poor thing. You are about to learn something that you can’t unlearn. Well here it goes. There are a number of people, who believe that the Earth was secretly populated by a reptilian race of Aliens who were looking to take over the world. Also, according to these people the reptilians have infiltrated every aspect of every government in the entire world. While not exactly cryptids, they are a humanoid reptile race terrorizing humans, which pretty much fits into the mythos of it all. A fantastic episode of Jesse Ventura’s Conspiracy Theory has interviews with people who can channel their “reptilian-ness” going so far as to speak in an actual language composed mostly of gibberish and chirps. Seriously. Also you can go on YouTube and look up reptilian conspiracies and find out how the Queen of England, pretty much every president and first lady, the Pope, and just about any ultra-rich or powerful person is a reptilian. The videos have images and clips from speeches or televised events, and you can see eyes shifting or teeth growing or even faces changing. It sounds like pure nonsense, more so than any cryptozoology That is why this is the saddest of all the cryptid beliefs. Sad because it’s insane. Even sadder if it’s true, because regardless how much evidence you have no rational person would ever believe you. At least Bigfoot and others actually have sightings and somewhat of a basis in science. Much like the number of licks required to breach the candy coating on a Tootsie Pop, the world will never know…..until they stop caring about hiding then we are all in deep shit.
Canvey Island Monster:
Weird Pink and English, this thing was found dead on a shoreline in England, was taken for research and then cremated, after it was found to be “no harm to humans”. No record was kept of it. Also a second specimen was found and was fresher than the first and was “studied” then whisked away without explanation. According to some “locals”/government plants “It’s just an anglerfish!” Here is an anglerfish/the only known “photo” :
Uh, absolutely no similarities. You gotta be kidding me. Somewhere along the line the story was switched, and I usually tend to believe the more extreme explanation, just cuz it’s more fun. If it was just this fish why would it need to be studied and taken away. Maybe those Reptilian theorists are onto something after all. Much like calculating the number of licks required to breach the candy shell of the Tootsie Pop, the world may never know.
The Montauk Monster:
Identified as a raccoon. Found in Montauk, NY, this strange dead thing, wasn’t available for public viewing after it was discovered, and was whisked away for research. Who knows it could be a raccoon. Or not!!
To end this post I think I should mention a Cryptid that has proven to exist.
The Devil Bird(AKA Spot-Bellied Eagle Owl)
This non-evil looking owl was known as the Devil Bird in Sri Lanka, and has been a part of their folklore for hundreds of years. It was rarely ever seen if at all. The main reason anyone knew of it was by its screech. Apparently, this owl has a bloodcurdling scream that sounds like a woman being chased by Leatherface. In the past it was seen as a bad omen(I can’t imagine why) and it was only recently identified in 2001, as a Spot-bellied Eagle Owl. But who knows, maybe there is a larger more eviler Owl hiding in the forest much like Aragog from Harry Potter and maybe it has it’s owl minions doing his bidding.
Thanks for reading, I hope it didn’t suck too bad. If you would like to wash the taste of this poorly drafted post out of your mouth try reading some of my League compatriots’ posts. I’m sure they will quicken your pulse.
Until next time.